This might come as a shock to some of you but saying “I’m not informed enough on this particular topic to have an opinion” is about 100 times more respectable than being misinformed
@rokirovka blease tell me what these poor benighted motherfuckers are saying
@theminism tbf speakers 1 and 2 seem like pretty reasonable people… i can’t really translate much of what the benighted motherfuckers involved are saying since they’re farther away (and swearing is hard to translate) but here goes nothing lmao just for you
speaker 1: What, they can’t drive out of each other’s way?
speaker 2: It looks like they can’t drive out of each other’s way. There’s not enough space. And they’re fighting.
speaker 1: They should have just pulled off and let the excavator go first.
speaker 2 [interrupting]: Of course.
speaker 1: What the heck are they doing over there
speaker 2: What the heck
speaker 1: Woah woah what the heck okay wow
speaker 2: What the hell [gets out of car] Hey, hey guys! What the f[this is where the beep comes in] are you doing!
speaker 3: Don’t take pictures!
speaker 2: I’m filming!
speakers 3 and 4: [inaudible] Don’t take pictures! Put the phone away!
speaker 2: Guys, calm down!
[the reckoning arrives]
speakers 3 and 4: [general yelling] No no no! f[beep]! Wow! Wow! [yelling continues inaudibly]
speaker 2: Wow guys! [laughs] Fuck, dudes! Wow you messed up! [laughs] now that, man, is a fuck up! Motherf[beep]! Get ‘em!
french recipes: if you’re not making this in paris then what’s the point. fuck you
italian recipes: use the left leg meat of a pig from one of three farms in this specific area of tuscany, or from this day my grandmother will begin manifesting physically in your house
american recipes: buy these three cans of stuff and put them in a pan congrats you cooked
chinese recipes, as handed down from mother to child: season it with a pinch of this and some of that. you want to know the exact amount? feel it in your heart. ask the stars. yell into the void.
English recipes: boil and salt it. Okay that’s it enjoy
Greek recipes: You followed all the right steps but this isn’t quite right. I don’t know what to tell you.
Australia recipes: chuck it on the barbie
Latinx recipes: you will never make it better than your abuela, face the facts
Armenian recipes: spend eight days laboring over the stove. the food will be flavorful with the sacrifice of your sanity. no one will appreciate it.
Canadian recipes: It either needs more bacon, more maple syrup, more gravy, or an unholy combination of the three
Polish recipes: you have to toUCH THE DOUGH, FEEL THE PIEROGI IN YOUR HEART, TOUCH IT. LICK IT. SMELL IT.
Every time I see this post, I learn more about how different countries’ cuisines AND neuroses.
Indian recipes: there are 500 cuisines and that means 500 versions of this dish that has 500 spices so gl
ashki jewish recipes: no, no. no. more onion.
internet recipes: here is a heartwarming story about my baby sister’s third birthday that i completely made up, and a copypaste from alton brown.
Irish recipes:
Finnish recipes: normal homecooked food but with imported ingredients because nothing grows here (expect like 2 months a year) ‘cause it’s so cold.
Chilean recipes: just need cheese, bread and ham. Congratulations, u did it
Me recipes: instant ramen noodles + boiled water. Congrats myself. I did it without burning myself.
having that terrible memory of when I burnt Ramen in the microwave… thankgods i have come a long way from that
american recipes revisited: 13 amazing ways to cram a vitamin down your neck between your second and third jobs!!!!
hey guys can you help me find that old portrait of a girl holding a little painting of a naked dude and cracking up about it?? I want to say it’s by Rembrandt but that’s probably not right
It’s “Smiling Girl, a Courtesan, Holding an Obscene Image” by Gerard van Honthorst!!