Tag: lmao

taddietango:

Check please characters and levels of omniscience

Jack: does not realize that their world is fictional at all. We all know this. Sometimes he wished it was tho.

Shitty: understands that a Great Something caused a rift between their universe and an alternate timeline somewhere around the 60’s. Like the Bearenstain Bears only its the BearenBad Bob. Tho he himself cannot pin point this exact event

Bitty: is aware that his tweets and parts of his vlogs are sent to another dimension yes

Chowder: Very omniscient. The Sharks aren’t even a real team in the Check please! universe he reached into the void and the void plopped Joe Pavelski, Martin Jones, and a Shit Ton of Merch into this Boy’s Lap. No one has pieced together that he’s rooting for a team from another alternate reality, they just think he really likes sharks. Or it’s like some obscure peewee team. He hides that he is All Knowing tho and sometimes that can make him come off as a little dumb. But he’d rather seem kinda silly than break Johnson’s trust and also break the universe (because. Johnson did offer that power to him. In canon. We just don’t know which pill our dear Chris took)

Tango: is actually from our Dimension. He just fucking Blue Skadoo’d his way into Ngozi’s blog one day. Feels kinda bad that it’s a self insert fic basically so he tries to move the plot along by asking questions he already knows the answers to. Questionably good at it. Like a crappy time traveler.

Farmer: a beam of sunshine who writes a lot of creepy pastas and like sixpenceeee stories and like that Glitch in the Matrix Reddit feed and all that. May not totally doubt her reality yet but if someone (Like Chowder) were to back up her claims she would believe their world is fictional in a second.

Nursey: that poor boy’s depression makes it so he’s already doubting if he’s real or not Please Do Not Tell Him and Make Him Suffer More

Dex: shockingly aware, not much but more than you’d expect. like he’ll look into the camera like he’s on the office and know that there’s an audience staring back. Likes to Tell Nursey and Make Him Suffer More.

Kent Parson: knows it’s fake but doesn’t understand the Genre of media that their reality is. Most days he takes the phrase “Sports Anime” v seriously. Thinks he is the anime protagonist of everybody’s dreams, once dyed his hair pink to prove it (or did he stop dying it blonde? #thetruthisoutthere). Someone tells him he’s the white haired anime boy antagonist and Kent cries for a week. Other days he is convinced it’s a Disney Feel Good Sports Movie™ about overcoming obstacles and the first openly gay NHL player. One time he thought it was a YA novel written by John Green.

Kit Purrson: Brown bear brown bear what do you see?
A L L

Ransom: slays ass in multiple dimensions of reality.

Holster: “yes, I’m a bisexual. I’m sexually attracted to people in our fictional reality AND in the real one”

Only when R and H combine their powers can they summon the in between white void between universes for Hockey Shit. They can also make chalk boards appear and disappear. They’re like the Wonder Twins if the wonder twins could manage to get even crappier.

Whiskey: doesn’t know. Doesn’t care. Once smoked one (1) pot and came close to understanding the Void but not quite enough and it didn’t stick.

Lardo: is aware that she’s occasionally the Token Lady Friend in a Male Driven Story so she uses this to her advantage to be as Gay™ as possible. She wants more ladies. She needs more ladies. Lardo/More Ladies 2k16. A future we can believe in.

Tater: his phone ring tone is Samwise Gamgee going “Taters? PO TAY TOES? Boil em mash em stick em in a stew”. He hasn’t even ever seen the lord of the rings movies. Shit wait I forgot what that has to do with him being omniscient. It doesn’t. It’s just another fact about him.
He doesn’t know their universe is fictional but he does know every single Falconer’s “real person equivalent” in the rest of the NHL from other teams. Has accidentally called himself Evgeni before.

Bad Bob: and on the eighth day, Ngozi created Bobert and Alicia and they walked in the garden of wonderful pansexual hockey love together. And Ngozi pointed to the tiny Jack Zimmermann growing there and said “don’t u shake this Jack too soon don’t u place your fictional hockey man expectations on him let him be” and so Babe Bbb did not. Until one day, The devil, who is also known as Ngozi, came and shook the poor Jappling and pointed the finger at Bib Boob. He and Alicia were banished from the Garden. The rest, as they say, is history.