Tag: lmao

violacakes:

lardo4lyfe:

camillacollinsfanclub:

reminder that this is an actual thing that was said by william ‘dex’ j. pointdexter to his captain at what is most certainly one of their first meetings. 

don’t look at me and tell me dex hasn’t had some very gay thoughts about jack’s butt.

#i like to think that it’s just kind of a rite of passage#that all smh team freshmen get HUGE GAY CRUSHES on the seniors#it’s just kind of a thing#it’s the juniors’ job to sit them down and be like#‘hey your feelings are valid and so is your romantic and sexual orientation…#but u don’t actually like this dweeb’#holtzy gave the talk to dex#bitty gave it to tango (about rans)#nursey will probz have to give it to the whole damn freshmen class for bitty rip 
tags via @chillwhiskey

Shitty designed his own So You Have A Crush On Jack Zimmermann, Don’t Sweat It Brah We’ve All Been There pamphlet to distribute to all freshman recruits.

What he must never know is that Jack and Lardo distributed their own pamphlet titled The Bewildering Appeal of Shitty Knight’s Sick Flow: A Survivor’s Guide.

toxicreverie:

kazoomusic:

kazoomusic:

lauramkaye:

thehypnobunny:

the-late-adopter:

shitifindon:

drethelin:

ozymandias271:

what does “men who adhere to strict gender binary” even mean tho

NO ONE adheres to the gender binary! NO ONE FITS THEIR GENDER ROLE PERFECTLY! THAT’S THE POINT! AARRRGGH! 

NOOOOO OOOOONE…. ADHERES TO THE GENDER BINARY LIKE GASTON!

Originally posted by clarabellecow

when I try to hear this in my head my mental voice is incapable of pronouncing it fast enough to fit the timing of the line

“noooo oooone… adjksjfksfjslenry like Gaston!”

and when I try to fit it to one of the longer such lines, my mental voice becomes too confused about conflicting scansion to continue

no one’s droll like gaston
no one’s swole like gaston
no one fits his assigned gender role like gaston

I’m especially fond of the paaaatriaaarchy
My what a guy that gastooon

Bless you for making it scan

NOW I CAN’T READ IT WITHOUT SINGING IN MY HEAD

No one’s droll like Gaston,
No one’s swole like Gaston,
No one fits his assigned gender role like Gaston!
For there’s no one online half as phony,
His tinder’s got dick pics to spare,
You can ask any neckbeard or brony
They’ll show you (no homo) whose trilby they’d wear!
No one drawls like Gaston
Or catcalls like Gaston,
Or manspreads on the train in a sprawl like Gaston!
I’m especially fond of the paaaatriaaarchy!
My what a guy that Gastooon!

…I’m not sorry.

You’re doing the lord’s work.

“any elf (generally or pick a specific one/ones) + casual sex” if you will allow this for the meme

gurguliare:

What if the horrible answer is I don’t think elves have casual sex and I’m fine with them all being insectile monogamists? …………. nooooo uhhhhhh hhhhhh I… still pretty much stand by “all sex is casual if it’s not telepathic” …. I guess I should pick a specific elf to talk about, it’s just, my answers for that are horrible too. I suspect Nerdanel and Fëanor managed to have a LOT of premarital sex through innovative, like, psychic blindfolds, and also that Nerdanel wanted to keep doing kinky willpower-based contraception while Fëanor was begging her for kids. It’s like orgasm denial but instead Fëanor is sitting there TRYING to push half a soul out and Nerdanel is jamming it back up the spout

hollowedskin:

i relate to this so much, i forgot about dogs and accidentally shoved my friends terrier off my lap expecting her to gracefully land and walk away, but she just ate shit and looked at me like i was a monster for the rest of the day 😦