Trump is willing to run the most unimaginable political and even criminal risks to block even the beginnings of a serious probe into his business history and the 2016 election. We are far, far past the point where there is any credible reason to doubt that President Trump is hiding major and broad-ranging wrongdoing. No mix of ego, inexperience, embarrassment or anything else can explain his behavior. It just can’t. He’s hiding bad acts. And the country is likely heading toward a major constitutional and political crisis because Trump is signaling that he will not allow the normal course of the law to apply to him – a challenge which puts the entire edifice of democratic government under threat.
If someone would like to draw Dex in the Haus kitchen, wearing an apron and mixing ingredients, while Nursey looks on with heart eyes, that would be so amazing I’d scream.
And I think part of that process of combating loneliness involves
acknowledging that close friendships aren’t necessarily easy. It’s like
exercise; some people are naturally drawn to working out all the time,
but most of us like “having exercised” but still groan as we schlep down
to the gym.
The most successful healthy people are often not the people who love
exercise, but who have accepted that the minor unpleasantness of putting
in an hour down at the gym will make their lives infinitely better.
Friendship, at least for me and my wife, is a weird balance, because
as introverts we have a natural reluctance to going out with people.
Left to our own devices, we’d rather nest in at home every evening –
we’ve spent time working, we want to relax, going out with people and
putting out more energy seems exhausting.
Yet we do it. Because we realize that if we followed our natural
instincts all the time, we’d be unhappy in the long run. We need
friends. But we can’t just call up our friends when we need them –
that’s treating them like tools. So we gotta get our duffs off the couch
and say those precious, precious words:
“Wanna hang out?”
We need to reach out and cultivate those relationships in advance,
to schedule nights out, to go to events we’re not really thrilled about
when we start out – because, like exercise, a lot of the time it
actually turns out to be pretty awesome once we’ve started. You feel
pumped, you feel jazzed, you feel glad that you went and did it.
A lot of maintaining good friendships is getting past that inertia of
“Don’t wanna.” (The other half is knowing which nights you’re
absolutely right to spend at home alone.)
Friendships are wonderful, and empowering, but they’re not a free
natural resource for most of us. And I think a lot of people wind up
lonelier than they should because they’ve got this weird, sitcom-fed
idea that friendships just happen – Joey and Monica and Chandler just
wind up on the couch at the coffee shop by magic every night.
Whereas the truth about friendships is that those “you wind up in the
same place every night” usually only happen when you’re living in the
same place, which only really happens in college. Once you’re a grownup,
your friends scatter, and you have to chase them down – Joey’s at the
cafe every Tuesday for open mic night, and Monica lives on the other
side of town but really wants to see that show at the Capitol Theater,
and Chandler’s working lots of overtime but hey do you wanna catch a
drink when he gets off work at 8?
You have to schedule. You have to go to places with people you’re not
100% comfortable with yet. You have to decide to leave your apartment.
That all takes a certain amount of labor. And you get rewarded big in
the end – there’s nothing better about walking into a room and seeing
that smile when your buddy shows up and getting that hug and knowing
that yeah, this evening was totally worth going out for because you
stuck with these people until you had a history together.
Aries: “I guess I’m ok with mine.” Taurus: “Wow this makes me feel super confident.” Gemini: “Half of me thinks this is stupid, the other half feels i may be an in-joke.” Cancer: “Fucking unrealistic I hate this. Unfollowed.” Leo: “Wow I DO like cats!” Virgo: “I don’t act like that, this isn’t worth a reblog.” Libra: “To be fair I did lick that swingset that one time.” Scorpio: “This is total shit, they’re talking about spiders. It’s Scorpio, idiots.” Sagittarius: “Wow this is like… So me… I feel it on a deep level. Horses, yeah.” Capricorn: “Haha lol what?” Aquarius: “Everyone knows astrology is fake you asshole.” Peixes: “They spelled Pisces wrong???”
It is often difficult to recognize the connection between early-life feelings of imprisonment, and our subsequent need for space and distance in our adult lives. This can be manifest in many different ways: non-committal relationships, career indecision, a perpetual need to live alone, social avoidance, perpetual mistrust of the world etc. For a time, these manifestations can actually serve a counter-balancing purpose, as our spirits breathe a healthy sigh of relief after years entrapped. If all you know is engulfment, it is essential that you have a taste of safety and spaciousness. But, taken too far, our escape hatches can actually become a prison of their own, one that deepens our isolation and prevents us from forming positive associations with the world. Any imbalanced reality has an imprisoning quality. Just because our early-life environment felt like a prison doesn’t mean that we can’t create a different reality-one that is rooted in healthy connectiveness.
just moving along like everyone else 