So I had the strangest dream this weekend and nobody understands me so I need to share it with you because you might. Press J to skip this post if you can’t deal, I will accept this.
In my dream I was standing on the back deck of a rural cabin that overlooked a beautiful Vermont/Scottish Highlands landscape of unspoiled wilderness. It was a crisp, perfect autumn morning. I held a cup of cooling coffee in my hands as I leaned against the railing and scanned the perfect rolling hills in the midground, behind which the great patterned mountains with their snowcaps marched on until they blended with the horizon: #aesthetic
As I gazed at a distant meadow clearing in the trees, a pair of brightly coloured humanoid creatures emerged from the woods and began to dance for each other. It was an esoteric, beautiful mating dance, a strange combination of instinct and choreography. I felt awe washing over me. I marvelled. I felt a deep sense of wonder and peace as I observed this vanishingly rare encounter that I had never thought to observe in person. These animals were instantly recognisable but had never been studied in the wild. I felt incredibly humbled and privileged to witness this behaviour – I knew that I was the first human witness to observe this behaviour – and I reached for my phone, wondering if I should film it, so it could join the scholarly record, where it NEEDED to be. This could change everything. But then I held back – something told me “no,” to let the creatures have their privacy.
Ok, I can’t go any further without telling you that they were Teletubbies.
A red one and a yellow one. I know. I know. Stay with me here.
The cryptids melted back into the woods. My subconscious drew a discreet veil over the rest of their mating ritual, but I knew instinctively that this had been a dance of courtship. I was busy pondering the implications, because they were critical. You see, although the creatures were instantly recognisable as Teletubbies, as I had studied them, even at a distance, I had an incredible realisation.
They were adult Teletubbies.
This realisation dawned on me and in my dream I understood it fully. The ones that we know of – the captive ones that we have seen on television – are juveniles. In fact, they are the equivalent of toddlers. When you see the adults this becomes obvious. The garbled speech and silly movements of the four captive Teletubbies we know are the babbles of babyhood, a private primal toddler-language brewed up between sentient beings who have never encountered an adult of their own kind.
The adult Teletubbies have more branching, complex antlers and shaggy coats. They are less brightly coloured. They are terrifyingly large. Their strangely human faces, emerging from the thick fur, are unquestionably adult; remote, serene, reproachful. Their television screens are glitchy, esoteric and unknowable. They are cryptids whose public exploitation has undermined their rarity and their strange, alien dignity.
In my dream my feelings of awe and peace turned to great sadness at the fate of the captive toddler Teletubbies. I realised that I had to be the scientist who brought this discovery to the world and raised awareness of their plight. And I also questioned: are Teletubbies like axolotls? Do they exhibit neoteny? (Axolotls, the cute aquarium pets with flaring gills, are actually juveniles of an amphibious species – if given the right conditions they’ll grow up into land-dwelling black newts. But they can breed in their aquatic juvenile form, and most spend their whole lives in this form. Deprived of their wild potential, will the Teletubbies ever mature? Or are they merely experiencing a long childhood, natural for a species that is unimaginably long-lived?)
So in my dream my husband came out onto the back deck and I began to share these discoveries with him and before I could even bring up the axolotls he just said “what the fucking fuck” and went away again.
I woke up disgruntled and unable to capture the feeling of peace and sadness. I then tried to explain this to my husband in the waking world, and he said “what the fucking fuck” and walked away before I even got to the explanation of the Teletubbies being toddlers, which just goes to show that you never know someone as well as you think you do.
Anyway I’m sure you guys will join me in this knowledge. And also I’ve googled it and apparently the Teletubbies reboot features infant Teletubbies, so clearly they are getting more from somewhere and the time to question this is NOW
I have a personal theory that how a dream makes you feel is more meaningful than the content.
What I got from your dream was a sense of wonder and privilege (the good kind), followed by the need to bear witness and advocate for the cryptids. Topped off with a disturbingly accurate example of the attitudes you’d face.
(staring nobly into the distance) yes. yes, you understand. you understand.
I’m so sorry but this is what came to mind and so this is what I drew
Holy
Thank you so much for sharing that dream, it was EXACTLY what I needed to stop feeling like shit. Now I, too, am honored by the knowledge of adult teletubbies.
I was reading this hippie dippie horse blog that’s all about psychic horse poetry and love and energy and letting your horses run around with no halters or vaccinations, whatever
I saw a link entitled ‘Equine Vasectomy, Castration, and the Karmic Wheel’ and I was like, ok, this will be a good one
and
i was not prepared
so firstly: the author has 2 studs who have clear psychic opinions on their junk
Jax seemed to have no issues with being castrated – almost as though he was expecting it and it was no big deal. Montaro, on the other hand, desperately wanted to remain a stallion and had already bred a mare or two when he arrived. He was so incredibly responsive to me, with such a stellar character, that I too wanted him to remain a stallion if possible. But there was one insurmountable problem. At the end of the field, the neighbour had seven mares, who all simultaneously bloomed into estrus and called to Montaro all day and night. He held it, and held it, and then bam, would go through the fence. After several days of him going through the fence twice a day, I told him I would have to phone the vet.
1. how has your neighbor not sued or shot you???
After the surgery, while both horses were under sedation, Kesia got in there to give them their first ever hoof trim, working furiously to get it done before the anaesthetic wore off. Jax and Montaro were semi-feral horses so they’d never been haltered, trimmed or handled by humans before:
2. so your horse is ‘super responsive’ to you and you have a psychic connection telling you he wants to stay a stallion, but he’s never been fucking haltered before??????
My formerly super-connected, responsive guy would now barely let me touch him. Fast-forward 6 months or so and he’s still angry. He kept saying to me, “I want my balls back!” And I would explain once again that he couldn’t have them back, and that he needed to accept responsibility too, as he also chose to be castrated because he wouldn’t/couldn’t stop going through the fence. This made no impact on him, and his anger and separation continued.
3. you’re….. expecting…. your semi-feral horse… to take responsibility…. for…….. being castrated………
So Ainsley is out at my barn, and I’ve told her that he’s still straining a lot to pee and I’m concerned that scar tissue from the surgery might be restricting things. But as he won’t let her touch him, she is just running Reiki to his groin area, with her hands underneath his belly. After about 20 minutes, she comes over to me and says, “Well, there’s only a few people I would tell this to, but… as I’m running Reiki for him,” she shows me her two hands cupped together, “I feel this weight in my hands, so I look down. And there are his balls. So I reattached them.” I gasp. “Oh my god. That’s what he meant! He meant he wants his energetic balls back!” Montaro then also wanted me to affirm this new reality, so for the next week, every time I saw him, I would visualize his scrotum hanging there and I would say “Nice balls Taro!” or “Looking good down there!” And then, all was complete. Montaro returned to being in powerful connection with me. He requested hands-on adjustments from Ainsley again, and all his anger was gone. My super-responsive, heart-connected lad was back. This experience makes me wonder about amputees who suffer phantom limb pain. Perhaps if they asked a Reiki or Pranic healer to reattach their energetic limb… perhaps their pain would cease?
4. NICE BALLS TARO. LOOKIN GOOD DOWN THERE TARO. YOU’VE TOTALLY STILL GOT BALLS TARO. PROPS ON YOUR PSYCHIC JUNK TARO.
well holy fucking shit banana. couldn’t get weirder right
HAHA WRONG.
Well, turns out when I “saw” the vet crushing the scrotum… those were my scrotum, in another lifetime. My parents sold me to become a eunuch (male who is castrated; often to guard females), I was in a fever for days, nearly died, didn’t want to live, and so on.
and then my brain fell out and i could read no more
Also yeah how tf are they not dead. If I was that neighbor I’d be having their guts for garters.
What the actual fuck
I just…
Ok so
I skimmed it
and
one of the neighbours mares did get pregnant. (?? or so I read it, it was a bit unclear) but at any rate, she got to keep the young colt, Juno. Who grew up to have his own sexual appetites.
She wanted to keep him whole, or maybe do a vasectomy-like thing instead. But she soon discovered that he would still harass the mares. She was advised that this would definitely cause pregnancies, as well as.. infections from all the sex, and he potentially could already have impregnated his own mother.
So she decided to castrate him after all. One problem: he wasn’t halter trained. (wtf?)
after the operation, she helped him heal with “herbs”
And now that we’ve dealt with the practicalities, let us float into other realms, shall we? If you thought the energetic reattachment of Montaro’s balls was out there… we’s goin’ even farther!
oh good lord what..
when I had talked to him earlier about the surgery, I had explained that he did not have to lose his energetic balls, he could keep them – just like his Uncle Jax did.
talked?
So she goes to sleep all worried about what she’s done, and has a dream (trip? hallucination?) (aka past life memory or some such) about she being castrated (her past self was a guy) and she figured:
So I was brutalized, and I have now brutalized Juno in exactly the same way. How am I ever going to get off the damn karmic wheel?
Apparently, by forgiving those who had done it to her.. past self? She had to write all this out and draw what “forgiveness” looks like. It looks like this guys:
Perhaps this is the central message of Jesus – that this balancing the wheel of karma, can take a very long time. But we can balance it another way: By forgiving all those who wronged, abused, tortured, hurt me; I can then forgive myself. And I can use this mechanism actively in this life to avoid generating any new karmic debts.
Perhaps by consciously – with full intention – giving the ultimate (his life) Jesus created a third alternative to a previously dualistic reality; yin/yang, dark/light. The3rd alternative is forgiveness.
My little atheist mind is spinning. I thought I kind of understood spirituality, but these are some advanced acrobatics. She even drew it:
the next day I askedboth Kumba and Juno to forgive me. And I forgave myself. […] You can see in the video how Juno trusts me to massage right near his incisions a few days after the surgery. If that isn’t proof that he’s forgiven me, I don’t know what is.
totally. That can’t be explained in any other way.
Also, Juno’s mom was pretty calm during the operation, which can only be interpreted like this:
Dare I suggest that she felt/knew this was the best option at this time and was anchoring both Juno and me with her peace and tranquility?
No. That literally cannot be it.
When Juno was going through the worst of the pain the day after the surgery, I was doing Pranic healing for him (streaming in blue/white light from my iceberg) and I said to him, “Oh sweetheart, I know it hurts, and it doesn’t make any sense. And you just can’t imagine why I would do such a thing to you. But do you trust me? Can you trust me that I have done this for a very good reason, that will benefit you greatly in the long-term?
that’s it. I’m done. Where did you find this stuff?
And let me just say:
Hi there new followers. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me, and then yourself, so we can all get off this karmic wheel.
that shitty little yin yang heart sketch is where I really lost my will to live
just moving along like everyone else 