I’ve commented on this before and I know exactly why it is, but it’s still kind of hilarious that out of all the things that Vriska did (murders and mind control and lying and betrayal and hubris and really stupid decisions and general assholery and narrative hijacking), what bothers me the most are the things she did to Tavros – except for killing him, which is the one part she actually felt bad about but also the… cleanest thing she ever did to him.
The absolute healthiest that Vriska’s feelings towards Tavros got in canon was “angry, so I’ll kill him. *kills him* haha I win”.
its been years so i might be misremembering but wasn’t it also in self defence, like she was about to get lanced for murders she (for once) didn’t do
He was trying to kill her, but that was part of the reason she was angry, I think, rather than something she considered a credible threat.
…Also I think it wasn’t because of the murders, I think Tavros was first of those – I think he was nominally trying to kill her because she admitted she’d helped engineer the creation of Bec Noir?
that was it, exactly, and Tavros was not remotely a threat to her at the time (her being god tier and him being barely able to walk down a flight of stairs)
She was annoyed that of all times he had to pick that moment to grow a spine, when it was the least useful to anyone.
eeeh, see, the thing is it wasn’t useful because her deeds were done, but it was the right thing to do as far as he was concerned.
she actually set out to cause the horrible situation they were stuck in, and not only proudly confessed to it, but also stated her intent to go face Bec Noir alone (which as we know would only result in a total party kill). At that point it wasn’t about him or what he could do, or whether it would solve their current problem; she had to be stopped because she had to be stopped, and she would only stop once dead (as far as he was aware).
vriska was pissed because he didn’t take a stand on her terms, or didn’t choose to develop a spine and fight the enemies she picked for him to fight, on her terms. She didn’t contrive this scenario for him to show his “courage”; she didn’t control the situation at all. Simply, when she was about something else, he decided to fight her, and it wasn’t for her or about her. It was for himself.
that’s why she killed him. and that’s why she was unhappy and confused about it afterwards.
I can’t even be mad at her about any of the Bec Noir stuff, it’s just so. Completely divorced from reality.
–Although it is VERY interesting to me that she gives the same “I encouraged it to happen, but it would have happened anyway, so no fault attaches to me” excuse that Doc Scratch gave to her.
folks who like to argue with gay people when we say “this character is gay/a lesbian” by saying “NO, theyre BI, here is an itemized list of every interaction theyve ever had with the opposite sex, you are committing BI ERASURE” are hilariously pathetic but the MOST pathetic are the people who think vriska is bi because she had a crush on nicolas cage
between john’s appreciation of nic cage in his dogged “heterosexual” way, vriska’s fake crush on john, and both of them using nicolas cage as a human figure they use to assert their heterosexuality by reacting to his traditionally masculine roles by respecting and mimicking him (john) and feeling swooned by him (vriska) it’s safe to say they’re both gay and their respective relationships with human actor nic cage are manifestations of their performative straightness
vriska actually wants to be a big strong hero and john thinks nic cage is fucking sexy. both do everything in their power to deny their truth up to and including dating each other for 12 minutes. they’re both gay
recently (and by recently i mean, since act 7 – if it was around before then i didnt see it) some hs bloggers, namely lesbian hs bloggers, have been presenting a lesbian reading of vriska that is pretty convincing imo. @revolutionarygays has written about it at length and unfortunately i cant… currently find any of her posts on the topic for u but im sure if u asked she would elaborate ;0
basically to my eyes, vriskas childhood and history of interactions with boys is very sympathetic and relatable to a lot of lesbian readers… she spends her whole childhood trying to aspire to mindfang, this high-femme fatale ideal who, in accordance with troll social norms, had both male and female sexual conquests and populated her quadrants the way a healthy, “normal” troll adult would be expected to, but her most important relationships (or the ones she devotes the most space in her journals to) are with men. so vriska tries to follow in her footsteps – she pursues a black romance with eridan (to mirror her ancestors kismessitude w dualscar) and red with tavros (ditto for the summoner) – but its very quickly made PAINFULLY clear that she doesnt have any actual investment in either of these relationships
eridan is introduced complaining about vriskas lack of commitment or interest in their kismessitude, and when vriska actually gets her hands on tavros, shes massively disappointed in the experience. its a hallmark adolescent gay experience of “maybe ill start being interested in the other gender when i date/kiss/have sex with them” and the ensuing disappointment when you find none of the joy or contentment in doing Straight Things, as heteronormativity had told you you would. hell, she only started interacting with john because terezi did it first – look how quick she is to bring her up in their first conversation!
on the other hand, vriska has a turbulent and passionate relationship with basically every girl she interacts with. she has a fucking emotional breakdown when faced with the reality that the once bright, cheerful aradia is now a lifeless shadow of her former self, and specifically that shes that way because vriskas the one who killed her (and that she was manipulated into doing so by scratch). kanaya, vriskas former moirail, punches her in the face and vriska immediately starts waxing red for her. (and that relationship was pretty frantic for a moiraillegiance in the first place – look how many 8s vriskas dropping near the end there.) … and i dont even have to address her relationship with terezi, because theyre obsessed with each other.
tl;dr vriskas struggle with gender norms, compulsory attraction to men (dont want to say compulsory heterosexuality because trolls dont have that, and compulsory bisexuality sounds stupid), and inability to pinpoint her feelings for girls as “romantic” is relatable to lesbian readers. she is lesbian-coded if nothing else.
this is SUCH a good post – i have to call it a night but i will definitely elaborate on this VERY soon!!
i think vriska’s very tomboyish and messy presentation (she.. appears to wear makeup? maybe? but to this day i don’t understand if it’s a stylistic choice or actual proof that she puts on makeup every day) also further her being gay-coded… vriska is very easily the most tomboyish and aggressive girl in homestuck, and her complete disenchantment with every boy she’s ever attempted to court is a huge part of her character.
it’s worth noting too that the only characters who can pull genuine softness and affection out of vriska are girls. she was absolutely smitten with meenah, very introspective and chatty and inquiring and just generally very devoted to her. she actually went out of her way to sincerely tell kanaya she appreciated her before she disappeared. she was very good, honest, and supportive of terezi in a way that made terezi genuinely feel better. vriska was the only person terezi opened up to – dave and karkat tried so hard to push terezi to open up to them but she was closed off and vague. but with vriska? she spills her feelings honestly and unprompted because she respects and admires vriska, and wants their relationship to be built on trust and honesty
vriska’s a miserable asshole 99% of the time but the only real emotion we’ve seen from her is either through introspection or connected to her relationships with the girls around her – never the boys.
so far i see the interpretations of this to be like really literal. you guys are thinking of vriska as just a character. weak. the concept of “a vriska” transcends the limits of a literal on page character. a vriska is a powerful story element. if you ever meet a vriska its already over for you. a family can just be 10 vriskas.
vriska really was a broken abused child tho. like i’m not saying she did nothing wrong or whatever, she’s like chronically stupid and full of bad decisions but like. she was a teenager and her life was so fucked up. it was so fucked up. she hates herself so much. she’s gay and considers herself unworthy of love because she’s impulsive and has poor social skills due to chronic childhood abuse. i love her and feel sorry for her and that’s just how it is on this bitch of an earth
keys to understanding why ppl love vriska, or understanding why u still root for her beyond her awkward funniness and pseudo charisma, or understanding why you feel bad for her but can’t figure out why:
1) she’s being abused by her guardian figure almost as blatantly as dave is. when she touches on this there is an underlying sense of anxiety and pain that sets her apart from her peers, much like dave is set apart from the other kids bc his guardian is blatantly abusive but (like vriska) he isn’t sure how to come to terms with or acknowledge it, much less explain it to his friends. in vriska’s case, her friends (for decent enough reasons) resent her for being insufferable regardless. outside of homestuck itself the paradox space comic “vrisky business” deals with this heavily and i while bring this up on a regular basis it’s still true
2) doc scratch is a pedophile. beyond being obviously a child predator, one of his primary targets is vriska. vriska is an easy target, of course, bc she’s already been dealt a pretty fucked up hand in life. vriska calls doc scratch as a “creep” more than once, to his face, refers to his behavior towards her as “getting off on [a young girl]”, and expresses extreme distress towards him continuing to have conversation with her when she’s asked him to leave her alone. she mentions that she’ll log out so that he’ll leave her alone… but then he takes control of her account and forces her to log back in and talk to him.
i mean i feel like this is laid on pretty fucking thick but in case the implication went over your head: it’s a metaphor for CSA lads
terezi alludes to the damage doc scratch has done to vriska during her own (rife with sexual innuendo and all around fucking creepiness, because he is Literally a pedophile) conversation with doc scratch while trying to get revenge on vriska for aradia’s murder:
“no wonder she snapped” – vriska took a sharp downturn under the influence of doc scratch, and the reader sees it firsthand. the murder of aradia was largely orchestrated by doc scratch, who forced vriska’s hand even while she frustratedly explains that these are her friends and she didn’t want to hurt them
here’s the whole pesterlog, since it’s all pretty telling:
take note that vriska calls doc scratch a “sick fuck” almost immediately after he contacts her. she’s very much backed into a corner here. tbh there’s a looot to pick up on in this conversation between them re: vriska being abused by an adult man
I find this really fascinating, since I am a victim of childhood parental abuse and yet I hated Vriska because her behavior towards Tavros was reminiscent of my abusive parent. Admittedly I was pretty young when I first read it and I could not pick up on metaphors for shit, and definitely missed the part about her being a victim as well. While I am coming to see her more as a grey character (thanks to things like this) I am still not sympathetic to her belittling of others and harsh self-righteousness. Survivors can be as kind as anyone else and their unhealthy behaviours shouldn’t be dismissed because of their past trauma.
Yeah, absolutely, plenty of perfectly interesting characters ping to close to home for me to enjoy. Heck, plenty of actual real people come too close to my trauma buttons for me to want to spend time around them or be a part of their healing, even though I still sincerely wish healing and mental healthiness for them.
So this isn’t meant to be a “you are wrong for not enjoying these characters” post.
This is just me picking at what pings me about them.
I have major imposter syndrome in my life. I was raised by an abusive narcissist and have hella fleas from that. I have a lot of trouble distinguishing extrinsic and intrinsic motivators. I am a pleaser and an overachiever, and I have lots of trouble not letting external sources define what my identity should be or how I should pursue happiness. I am meanest to others when I say the things in my head that I am already saying to myself. (I don’t think I do this much anymore. I am getting better on both ends, but I hope especially the first.)
Anyway.
Characters that externalize their self-hatred onto others in ways I find interesting: Vriska, Bakugo, Loki
These are not nice people; these are, in fact, distinctly abusive people. To me, they are also engaging, sympathetic, and more than anything fascinating characters because they are all so clearly unhappy. Because they are all, so clearly, equally cruel to themselves.
Like, example:
Loki finds out he’s an ice giant and literally tries to genocide all ice giants. And on the one hand, hello, genocide, wtf, but on the other hand it is impossible for me not to see that as the intensely suicidal gesture it is. Notably, immediately after his attempted metaphorical suicide is stopped, he literally jumps off a bridge.
Now Vriska. Damn, that girl is messed up. Does anyone even know why she walked Tavros off that cliff? Does Vriska? What the fuck. What the fuck.
You want to understand what’s going on in Vriska’s head, you just have to look at the conversation she has with her dead self. (Andrew Hussie is a master of metaphorically presenting serious mental issues like depression and suicidal ideation as conversations w/ self. See the conversation Dirk has with AR.).
I mean, seriously, this shit is vicious.
She explicitly points out that she’s never felt happy. (And later that she’s never felt safe.)
She explicitly characterizes her own desire to be happy as “selfish” and “narcissistic.”
She is not allowed to want small, nice things that make her feel safe. Not only is she not allowed, wanting happiness makes her bad as a person.
And she repeatedly frames all this in the most gaslight-y, emotionally charged, self-hating language imaginable: “the worst kind you’re capa8le of”, “stupid”, “self-indulgent”, that she deserved “to get killed”.
Live Vriska frames personal growth as explicitly incompatible with happiness. She is supposed to do what’s necessary (as defined by unclear sources, but most strongly linked to her ancestor and her society) and live up to exterior expectations.
Live Vriska frames this intensely vitriolic, negative, self-hating take on life as “harsh truth” that she (dead, happy Vriska) “USED to understand.”
Live Vriska is not allowed to feel bad when bad things are said about her because these “tiny little 8arbs” are harsh truths and part of life (and not, you know, devastating and abusive attacks on her sense of self and desire for happiness/safety/stability.)
Live Vriska has normalized abuse. She does not recognize it aimed at herself. She, in fact, mirrors and echoes and amplifies the abusive messages she has internalized, both to herself and to the people around her.
Vriska, quite explicitly, believes happiness is selfish, believes she is not allowed to feel bad about abuse, believes she deserves anything bad that happens to her, considers herself an inherently bad person, and hatesherself.
And the thing is, like:
Vriska is 13-16 over the course of the comic.
13 year olds aren’t born with these ideas existing in their heads. They learned them somewhere. They heard them over and over. They were hurt, repeatedly, and repeatedly told that wasn’t hurt, that was harsh truth, and having bad feelings about what was happening made them weak and selfish. Made them deserve what happened to them. Their sense of normal and not normal and abusive and not abusive was deeply distorted by their childhood environment.
(Like, possibly, having a parental figure who has trained you to sacrifice other child victims to her for your own continued survival.)
And, you know, I also think we have evidence that Vriska’s particular mental set up makes her more vulnerable to this. Shades of BPD or NPD, she seems to react very strongly to perceived criticism and to have a very externally-defined sense of self. We know she can hear other people’s thoughts; we know she is sensitive (or even hypersensitive) to other people’s perceptions of her.
We see this even in the happier, shaking-off-old-patterns, dead Vriska. Dead Vriska spends some time with a (significantly older) troll she admires and you can see how malleable her sense of self is, her sense of goals and values are, as she almost completely remakes her identity in Meenah’s image.
Also, returning to the topic, hell yes Vriska is abusive towards others. Hell yes she causes a lot of harm and emotional damage (and death!!). And hell no those people don’t owe her any more of their time or trauma.
But I do think it’s clear her abusiveness towards others hella mirrors the patterns of abusiveness she’s playing out in her own head. You can see the things she says to herself in the things she says to others. You can see her turning around and mirroring the “hard truths” she’s internalized, and all the uncontrollable scariness of the world she’s in. (If you don’t do these things, if you don’t live this way, you will be hurt and you will deserve it. You will deserve to die.)
And I still don’t know what the fuck was going on when she mind-controlled Tavros off a cliff in some kind of hysterical fit, but just in writing this post I have had the dawning, creepy realization that that was a very chilling manifestation of “I’m hurting you to help you grow/this is the only way” coupled with the enactment of a suicide.
…..Yikes.
Anyway, tl;dr: I find Vriska very interesting and I am like 99.999% convinced that live Vriska has the (so far) failed character growth arc and dead Vriska has the actual successful character growth arc (as resolved by her eventual reunion with much healthier partner dead Terezi).
do i have any homestucks (besides the obvious) even still following me? anyways give me vrisnep headcanons?
that’s a terrible ship and I hate you for summoning the thought into my mind out of the ether.
anyway – au where nepeta waits for vriska to go out flarping and kills her lusus, getting somewhat injured in the process but recovering anyway because (naturally) cats have nine lives :33.
vriska goes berserk with rage and attempts to hunt nepeta down across the forests and caves of alternia to exact an even worse revenge, but nepeta knows the land and has superior vision in the dark, and by the time she actually catches up to nepeta she’s exhausted and hungry and miserable and has had a chance to think about some shit.
“you’re furee :33 have some roast [bizarre alternian animal]” says nepeta, courteously, and vriska makes her punch herself in the face a few times before she completely runs out of steam and can’t mind control shit, faceplanting and shrieking into the dirt for a few solid minutes.
nepeta pawses, licks her wounds, kicks vriska over onto her back and clubs her right in the mouth with [alternian rum ham equivalent], and waits until vriska grudgingly starts chewing on it, then sits on her legs.
“what the fuck is wrong with you?” vriska asks, somewhat rhetorically. “no8ody asked you to meddle in my fucking 8usiness. like, who died and made you the Empress, huh? what made your puny little 8rain think it was a good idea to cross me?” irritatingly, nepeta giggles. “shut the fuck up, I’m interrogating you! why did you do it?”
nepeta grins. she has very sharp teeth, and her eyes are like yellow lamps in the dim firelight. “the same reason everyone hunts, silly. the glory of the kill.”
vriska swallows. nepeta goes ^w^.
“… you know what?” vriska says, a hint of something that might be admiration in her voice. “you might 8e as crazy as I am.”
“fat chance,” nepeta sniffs. then she tilts her head. “what are you gonna do, now that you don’t have to feed her?”
vriska has been trying to find an answer to that question for the past six nights she’s been pursuing nepeta through the godforsaken wilderness. she still doesn’t have an answer.
“Kick your ass,” she says.
“you can try,” nepeta offers, charitably.
“8uild my own ship and explore the universe.”
“i don’t think mister mustard likes you enough to cart you around, though.”
“Destroy the Empire.”
“… what for?” nepeta asks, perking up a bit with interest.
vriska stops gnawing on the bone and tosses it into the fire, settling her hands behind her head. her eyes wander to the entrance of the cave, and the black sky littered with stars.
“… Same reason every8ody hunts,” she says, and grins.
when someone mentions Pearl Discourse i always think about how the MSPA forums have had a series of Vriska Quarantine Threads for literal years now because otherwise every discussion eventually turned into a giant Vriska argument
case in point:
these threads last 100 pages, or up to 2500 posts each before a new one is made. so it could be much worse
the mere fact this vriska argument went on for 42,500 posts and still going is a good estimate of human nature
just moving along like everyone else 