absolutely nothing about this video or scenario is what I would call ‘relatable’ and yet I intrinsically understand it and relate to it anyways, due to the sheer power of chris fleming’s story telling. i feel like this scenario has been living in my soul for 20 years because of this.
i don’t know how he does it but chris fleming just makes the absurd, yet impossibly specific, universally identifiable
tier 5 (ridiculous, unacceptable, pls don’t): anything to do with beer cans, baby-maker, bishop, choad, donger, dragon, fuck wand, fun stick, hog, johnson, jimmy, lap rocket, little [insert name], love muscle/rod/stick, meat stick, one-eyed [anything], piston, private eye, schlong, trouser snake, wiener, winkie
tier 6 (you’re literally a fourth grader): baby arm, baloney pony, beaver basher, beef whistle, custard launcher, dude piston, flesh flute, heat-seeking moisture missile, krull the warrior king, luigi, mayo shooting hotdog gun, meter long king kong dong, pig skin bus, piss weasle, purple-headed yogurt flinger, purple-helmeted warrior of love, schlong dongadoodle, single barreled pump action bollock, spawn hammer, steamin’ semen truck, tan banana, thundersword, wang doodle, whoopie stick, wing wang doodle, yogurt shotgun
tier 7 (you are like a little baby. watch this): the symbolic collage, the multiplier of motions known, a pillar of fighting styles terrible to behold, the ability to infer significance in something devoid of detail, cornered sphere, a letter written in uncertainty, flesh-metal, a bubble of foul water and fire, invisible scripture, the sex-death of language, power throat, the heart bone, the mercy seat, the irrefutable-for-a-span, the enigma that must be removed, the new phlogiston, a throne of wonder why, the idiom stroke, non-spatial space filling to capacity with mortal interaction and information, a bit of string shaped like your favorite color, the sword not held, estrangement from statesmanship, the reptile wheel, the treasure wood sword, a million-eyed insect dreaming, the dome-head demon, a dead carapace of memory, the mythic epidermal, the ethos knife, flute-and-pipe ogre, the red jewel of conquest, a walking star
You basically made me read the cuil theory of penis metaphors so I’m posting cuil theory
(Just thought I’d share this in case someone finds it useful!)
This is basically all the advise my speech therapist has given me so far, just condensed and without the exercises and it’s really amazing advice! I’d also suggest that if you have a smartphone get an app called voice analyst because it gives you feedback on your average pitch as well as showing you how low your pitch gets, and for me and lots of other girls an issue in passing as that we can get our voices up to around 200hz but several times per sentence drop back to like 120 and it shows you when you’re doing that so you can focus on it.
just moving along like everyone else 