Tag: to remember

Writing requires discipline, but disciplined writers are not necessarily prolific. Most good work gets produced over time, sometimes many years, allowing the writer to grow with the material, to allow her world, her command over craft, and her psychological maturity to coalesce at just the right moment to produce something of value. This process often involves dreadful periods of not writing, or, worse, periods of writing very badly, embarrassingly badly. As time passes in a writing life, the writer learns not to fear these arid periods. The words come back eventually. That’s the real discipline: to train the mind and heart into believing that words come back.
…
Be willing to wait. In the meantime, write when you don’t feel like it. If you can’t write, read.

Monica Wood, The Pocket Muse (masculine pronouns changed to feminine)

I needed to hear this today.

(via savetheteaboy)

And again today.

(via one-bite-at-a-time)

(See also: the Law of Undulations)

So You Want To Save The World From Bad Representation

writingwithcolor:

Stop.

Wait a minute.

Realize we can’t fill your cup for you.

Wanting to stop bad representation is all well and good. It’s noble! But just as fetishization can turn “I love this culture” into a negative because you actually love your idea of the culture, wanting to save the world from bad representation can also turn very negative.

Why? Because you want to play saviour to PoC.

We don’t need a saviour. Chances are, we’ve already written about the issue you want to write about. In your valiant effort to give accurate representation, tripping over yourself to ask what’s okay, what to avoid, how you can properly write this situation, how you can be a Good Ally and get cookies and generally stop being a White Person that’s discussed whenever PoC talk about racism… you add to the burden of emotional labour instead of detract from it.

You’re putting your own desire for immediate knowledge above everything else.

Instead of turning to Google and educating yourself, instead of going through our guides over and over again, instead of educating yourself across an extended period of time, instead of searching for authors of colour you can lift up, you want answers to your questions right now so you can stop being a White Person and just be a white person.

You won’t stop being a White Person overnight. You will not go from 0 to Passable Representation thanks to one question and one conversation. Even if we were to give you a list of what to avoid (which, honestly, our blog is a very large list of exactly that), it would still take you years of noticing your own behaviour to change. 

Take for example our most recent correction: using a Chinese example when the ask was about Tibet. Despite a fair chunk of education and several posts about how much China has taken over lands that do not want to be taken over by China, that mistake was still made. 

And that’s with education. That’s with knowing, intellectually, the context of China/Tibet relations. If you’re jumping in from scratch having only taken in enough racism education— enough to know you should be representing diverse cultures, not enough to know where to start— you’re going to make even worse mistakes.

That isn’t to say you shouldn’t start learning! But recognize it is a process, and that wanting to save the world isn’t a sustainable reason to educate yourself and write good representation. You probably shouldn’t jump straight into the deepest depths of representation right away.

So What Can I Do?

Write stories you think are worth telling because they’re interesting stories, not because you want to “prove” how good/interesting they are. Write stories you are curious about, instead of picking the most under-represented group you can think of. Make sure your drive is from curiosity, not white saviour. You shouldn’t be trying to prove to everyone these stories are worthwhile; you’re very likely to fall into model minority because you don’t want to show anything “bad.”

Signal boost stories PoC have already written. You are not the first person to write about an issue, and chances are authors of colour have done it better. You can use your white privilege to lift up PoC narratives, bringing them to a new audience. Look through #OwnVoices or #WeNeedDiverseBooks as a starting place. Give value to authors of colour writing about their own culture, their own world, instead of thinking the value comes from your outsider take on it.

Realize you’re going to have to start small: background characters, adding diversity to friend groups, having more than one of any ethnicity to avoid tokenism. If you do fantasy writing, start by learning about trade routes such as the Silk Road and add in references to other countries’ trade links, while also realizing “exotic trader” is a very toxic trope.

Also, realize you’re going to be in this for the long haul. If you are interested in a fully immersive story set in another culture, you’re going to be spending years, perhaps a decade, learning enough about it to do it justice.

You don’t need to ask us to get the basics (food/clothing/religion/trade relations) of a culture. We can tell when you haven’t researched it.  

Writers are renowned for our research ability. How long will you spend looking up the weather in 1600s England, the process of learning how to be a swordsman, the average medical knowledge of a farmhand? The same applies to learning about PoC settings. You might be starting from scratch, but simple searches like “clothing in 1500s China”, “goods that traveled on the Silk Road”, and “Native American cities pre-contact” are starting places. It might be a little more basic because of unfamiliarity, but remember that you didn’t know stuff about Europe once upon a time.

Learn the definitions of appropriation, fetishization, and white saviour. Realize they all come from the same roots: a person’s ideas about a culture over the actual reality of the culture. Instead of assuming you know what there is to know, research to find out if you “know” a fake thing. You might “know” how horses work, but do you know the Disney version or the horseback rider version? 

The research we are asking you do is the same research. It’s the same steps of searching for a particular fact and building your story based on the details you uncover. It’s not some murky waters of hard to find information— especially as the internet is ever-expanding, and sometimes a few years or even a few months down the line you discover the information has been made available (“weather in India” wasn’t a wikipedia article 12 years ago, for example).

Learn you and your ideas are secondary. The facts are first. It will take time to learn that you are secondary, because whiteness by nature puts itself first. It is not an instant process because you don’t realize how deep it runs. You will mess up. You will get corrections.

Apologize (genuinely— no “I’m sorry if I offended you”; say “I’m sorry I made this error”), admit you were wrong, and do better. Research more, take more time, maybe even edit the previous work with your new knowledge so it really sticks. This is, after all, a process! 

You just have to do the work. You can’t come to us and say “how do I represent this group”, because we can’t tell you in a reply to one ask. You have to dive into the history, current situation, and culture of the people you want to represent. 

You have to fill your own cup of knowledge, and willingly drink all parts of culture: sweet and bitter alike. Drink from cups we have offered you already instead of trying to build your own. You can’t just take the sweet (finding it a fantasy world) or the bitter (the trauma of racism) and think you have enough.

—WWC

robotplant:

cleromancy:

depressionresource:

If you struggle with anxiety, overwhelm, or just plain feeling like a failure, I have a mantra for you that’s been really helping me out lately:

Just show up.

I used to skip class because the whole thing was so overwhelming: I had to get dressed in something clean even though I never had the energy to do laundry, walk to school, sit in class for up to three hours, plus pay attention, take notes, and participate in discussion. In reality, I was being a perfectionist, and life would have been a lot easier for me if I had Just Shown Up. By staying home because of my depression and anxiety, I wasn’t giving myself the chance to do any of that. I was such a perfectionist that being a “bad” or average student was unthinkable, so I stopped being a student at all.

If you’re having trouble getting something done, Just Show Up. You don’t have to be employee of the month. You don’t have to be valedictorian. Just Show Up.

ime it also helps to be like “you dont have to stay the whole time, you just have to go” bc most of the time once youre there it’s fine. a lot of things are like that, like… you dont have to finish the dishes, just start them. a lot of the time once you start a task it’s easier to finish than to stop, especially if you can trick yourself like “after five more minutes if i still feel bad i’ll go home” or “after washing two more dishes i can stop for today”

even if you don’t finish the task, you started it, and by completing part of it you lessened your future workload and ALSO taught your brain that things may not be as daunting as they seem

This is wisdom! Peace!

universi-tea:

i think one of the biggest problems i have with getting stuff done is i assume it’s easy for other people. like “she gets up at six every morning because she’s a morning person” or “yeah, he can run five miles every day but he likes running” or “she knows five languages, her brains just wired differently than mine” when in reality it’s all about discipline for everyone. like yeah, some people have natural aptitudes for some things but anyone that’s accomplishing anything is putting in the work. achievements don’t come easy, and i think if i start acknowledging that it’s like that for everyone i can stop making excuses

PSA For New/Beginner Musicians

roachpatrol:

copperbadge:

qa-stringsandstrumming:

Sorry I haven’t posted here in a bit folks, been rather busy trying to get that EP out, but now that I have, I’m back and I’m all yours.

Anyways, I have some important advice for… well any musician, really, but it’s something I know I struggled with a lot when I was first starting out and I wish someone had told me.

Now this may not be so prevalent in certain circles, but in the circles I started out in (and some I’m still in), gear seems like it’s everything. And honestly? “Good” gear, the gear people dream of, and the gear people really want, is expensive.

But more importantly, it doesn’t really matter. All that matters is that whatever you’re playing, whatever your setup is, sounds good to you. Even if it doesn’t sound good to anyone else, the question is, do you like it? As long as the answer is yes, you don’t need to change a thing.

Some of, what to me, is the best sounding gear I own, is also some of the cheapest.

What got me thinking on this is I just watched a video of a guy playing a $100 guitar and a $10,000 guitar. 90% of the time, if I closed my eyes, I honestly couldn’t tell which was which. When I could, I actually personally preferred the $100 one’s sound.

I’ll probably follow this up with a quick little advice post on finding good gear for cheap as well, because I’ve discovered that quite often what you end up paying the big bucks for isn’t quality, it’s the brand name.

– Mod Cody

I was just thinking about this! I saw a video of a guy playing his first cheapo ukulele and the latest one he bought, which was very high end. There’s an audible difference between the two, but I’d be hard pressed to say which one was better. The material in the more expensive one was nicer, and it had better tuning pegs and such, but I do think it’s important that you buy for what you like, not what anyone else thinks you should have. 

I really like looking at different ukes and I will probably buy a nicer one eventually, but my Kala sounds just fine, really, and on the plus I’m rarely worried about it getting knocked around when I’m traveling. 

i’m a visual artist, but what my dad said to me a couple times when i was a kid, nagging him for expensive pencils and markers, was: 

“A bad craftsman blames his tools.”

expensive tools will never substitute for skill, dedication, and practice. you can’t stand there and say ‘i suck because my tools are too cheap.’ it’s a sad excuse.

again, i’m a tone-deaf illustrator, but what i know about music is that over and over through history, people denied access entirely to high-class instruments will do what they can with what they have, and create new forms of music. musicians have used gourds, old washboards, tapedecks. there’s a capella and beatboxing if you don’t even have that! you don’t need a thousand dollar guitar to be great, you need persistence, and that’s free. 

ELEMENTAL HOUSE CLEANSE

the-ram-witch:

  • Fire – sit down and relax. Let pure universal energy enter through the top of your head and let it connect with your own life force. Once it’s connected and working together imagine a small flame spreading from the inside of you. It can start anywhere you’d like, the center of your stomach, your head, your palms, your legs, anywhere that feels comfortable. This is not a fire that destroys and burns, this is a pleasant fire that makes you feel loved and warm. Once you’ve set yourself on fire, once you’ve felt the flame all around and inside your body, slowly let it spread on the inside of your house. This can be done with a slow small flame, or a violent huge one. Just let everything burn, imagine the fires cleansing properties burning away all the nastiness inside your house. Imagine ashes flying everywhere, and all the negativity burning away into nothingness once it’s been touched by the flames.
  • Water – sit down and relax. Let pure universal energy enter through the top of your head and let it connect with your own life force. Once it’s connected and working together imagine yourself as a fluid body. See and feel the cool refreshing touch of water on your body. Feel the fluidity inside yourself. Then imagine huge water, huge waves, flooding your house, pushing everything it comes in contact with. Let it mess up your house. See this water, running from one door to another, flooding everything, and destroying everything just like a tsunami would. Imagine this pure, clean and clear water gathering all the negativity in itself, taking it away with her. When you’re done, imagine one window or more, or a door open in your house and let the water go away.
  • Earth – 

    sit down and relax. Let pure universal energy enter through the top of your head and let it connect with your own life force. Once it’s connected and working together imagine huge roots bursting through your floor, intertwining all around your body. Once they’ve intertwined imagine them giving birth to flowers while all around you. Imagine these intertwined roots going all around the walls, the windows, your mirrors, your table, your bed. Imagine beautiful moist soil pouring out of the holes left by the roots. Imagine this soil filling up your house, gathering in itself all that is no longer needed and negative. Imagine transforming that negativity into something beautiful. Imagine the poisonous bad energies transforming into love and light inside the earth. Once they’ve transformed imagine this earth giving birth to more beautiful light green roots, leaves, and the most beautiful flowers you’ve ever seen. Let your whole house fill up with these beautiful flowers and roots, replenishing everything in your house. Feel the flowery scent all around you. When you’re done imagine all these roots and earth slowly going back into the whole where they came from, leaving everything intact but cleansed and fresh.

  • Air – 

    sit down and relax. Let pure universal energy enter through the top of your head and let it connect with your own life force. Once it’s connected and working together imagine violent winds forcing their way in your house through the window.

    Imagine these winds entering and bursting through like a hurricane through your house. Even though they are violent, they are here to help and leave everything in a better place.They’re coming straight for you. They start whirling around you, you can feel it’s pleasant coolness on your skin.

    You can hear the sounds of the wind.

    They are so strong, yet so caring and pleasant. As they whirl harder and stronger around you, they lift you up in the air, whirling even harder than before. Now, imagine them turning to the rest of your house. Imagine them leaving a mess wherever they touch. All of your notebooks are in the air, your tarot cards are flying everywhere, your clothes go all around the place, your crystals fly from one wall to another. Let these fresh and cool winds clean your place. Once you’re done, imagine these winds leaving through the window they came from.

gnarlywals:

corduroy-jackalope:

The brain is an organ. Mental illnesses are illnesses of that organ. Brain scans show that there is a physical difference between a healthy brain and a sick brain. Telling someone “You’re not really sick. It’s all in your head.” is like telling someone with asthma “It’s not real, it’s all in your lungs.” The brain is an organ that can malfunction as much as any other organ.

PLEASE READ THIS OVER AND OVER AND OVER

kenderfriend:

arkhamarchitecture:

edens-blog:

emt-monster:

Please reblog if you know anyone who might take party drugs.

this is so important

Also important information: A cop cannot arrest you for something you already took. You can tell a cop to his face that you just injected black tar heroin in your veins and as long as you don’t currently have any on you (including things like syringes or residue in a pipe), there’s fuck all he can do about it.

I take police reports for a living. The number of people who will happily tell someone “Well officer, this fight started because I smoked crack cocaine earlier,” is astounding and also not at all illegal. The criminal charge is for Possession of a Controlled Substance. If you don’t possess any at the time, there’s no crime. The only thing you can get dinged for is if you’re actively on a drug and driving, in which case – DUI.

Please, please, please tell EMTs what you took. They’re not going to rat you out to the cops and even if they did, you will still be okay.

Spreading the word, being honest with paramedics and doctors can save your life

copperbadge:

So I just did a post about how I manage my time and my daily schedule and such, and I felt like this part is really important and was getting lost in the minutiae of my day, so I made it a separate post. I was talking about various ways in which my life is not necessarily “normal”, like how I go to bed at 7:30, which people treat as one of my eccentricities, and rightly so. But while it is weird it speaks to the crux of my life philosophy, which I’ve spoken about before as regards dealing with anon hate:

My time and attention are finite resources and they have a value I can bestow where I wish. If something is not necessary to survive, does not solve a problem, or does not provide joy, I stop doing it.

I pay my bills and do my dishes and wash my clothes because you have to do those things. I engage in activism and try to stay current on the news because I believe I have a moral duty to contribute to society, and I run because it’s good for my heart and my body. I have friendships, engage in fandom, play the ukulele, write, go to concerts and movies and art galleries because it brings me joy to do so.

Going to bed early solves a problem for me: I wasn’t doing anything useful with that time anyway, I wasn’t enjoying myself or feeling happy. If I wasn’t getting any benefit from that time, how could I put it to better use? Sleeping is beneficial, so I tried that, and it worked; I get more sleep and I don’t miss anything I can’t catch up with. Work doesn’t make me especially happy or fulfill me in ways we could all wish, but that’s okay. Work is necessary to survive, so I do it. I don’t date much because I tried dating semi-recently and the promise of future joy did not outweigh the lack of joy that dating itself brought to my life; it was painful, ugly, and boring, and so I stopped doing it. 

The dating thing may change in the future, if eventually the promise of a relationship becomes more enticing, but it’s an example of how the pursuit of happiness is non-standard, and you are allowed to weigh the cost against the payoff based on your own personal feelings, not on society’s dictates. Because it turns out when you are doing what makes you happy, when you feel joy, you could give two shits about what everyone else thinks should make you happy. 

Sometimes, what brings me joy is sitting on the couch listening to a podcast I’ve already heard ten times and playing a stupid mindless flash game; I often catch myself thinking “I could be doing something more useful, something cooler, something more active” and remind myself “But this is making me happy, and it’s what I’m capable of doing right now.”

“Does this make me happy” or, if you’re struggling with happiness, “Does this calm and soothe me” is a great metric for what you should be doing in life when you are on your own time. It’s a good way to check in with yourself and lead yourself towards a more fulfilling life on your own terms. 

If you are out at a bar with friends, stop and ask, does this make me happy? Because there is no way in which asking that does not help. If being at a bar doesn’t make you happy and if it’s the only time you see your friends, maybe it’s time for a change; you are now free to pursue something that will make you happy. If being at a bar doesn’t make you happy but your friends do, and this is one way to bond with them of many, then it’s a cost with a later benefit, and you’ve now become conscious that while you aren’t happy right this minute, you are paying into future joy. And if you like being out at a bar with friends and are having a good time, then you’ve reaffirmed to yourself that you are happy and this is where you want to be. And affirming that you are feeling joy is a great thing to do. 

You don’t have to be happy all the time – but on your own time, when work and chores and the duties of the day are done, you should devote yourself to finding joy in whatever form that takes, be it a nap or a party or a date or your kids or, I don’t know, watching people make fake food on YouTube. 

Believing that your time and attention have value and should only be bestowed on the worthy means coming to believe that you have value, which is so hard to do that I’ll take any shortcut I can get. Devoting your time time and attention only to what is necessary or what is pleasurable means learning a great deal about what you value, and I truly believe leads you to a more fulfilled life.

So when people ask me about time management, I have real tips and tricks to offer – but I think the most important think I can offer is the suggestion that whatever time you have, you should believe it has value because it is yours, and you should direct it appropriately.