I started thinking about who looks up to who on the team the other day, and the more I thought about it, particularly the Dex:Ransom::Nursey:Holster dynamic, the more interesting I found the parallels.
i love william “i built a back deck for the samwell hockey haus because i was procrastinating on my final” poindexter and christopher “i helped him because i was procrastinating on my final” chow and eric “i made lemonade for them because i was procrastinating on my final” bittle and derek “i brought them the lemonade and watched in interest while they built the deck because i was procrastinating on my final” nurse and
So a while ago in the stream chat, the “Nursey has two moms” headcanon came up, and N was like, “That’s wild. I mean, it’s always been that Nursey’s dad is white and his mom is black, but okay.” (That’s paraphrased.) And obviously his parents have never appeared or even really been mentioned in canon, so headcanon away with the 2-4 moms, etc., but I’ve been thinking about how the more canon-based version of his family could give us the character we see enter Samwell as a frog.
Derek’s favorite version of Dex is the Dex that flickers like the soft light of a candle. The Dex that doesn’t pretend that he hates being held, the Dex that whispers in Derek’s ear about his day like it’s a secret, like Derek is the only person allowed to hear the mundane facts of Dex’s life, what he ate for lunch, what Angelina from stats told him about Professor Greene. The Dex that likes to kiss Derek’s nose and eyes twice each because he doesn’t like odd numbers. The Dex who will hold Derek’s face in his hands and press their foreheads together. Who has cinnamon eyes and when he tells Derek he loves him, he believes it.
Derek’s favorite version of Dex is the Dex that skitters around like a bunny in spring. The Dex that forces him to sit down and watch the 1960s Star Trek only to talk over it the entire time. The Dex that will hook his chin over Derek’s shoulder and say “mmm yes” in a horrible impression of Yoda. The Dex that blows raspberries into his stomach when he’s drunk and sometimes when he’s sober. The Dex who has a Boba Fett action figure on his nightstand just in case. The Dex that will hold his hand when they walk into the video game store every single time.
Derek’s favorite version of Dex is the Dex who burns down cities with the slightest spark. The Dex who presses Derek down into the mattress and moans in his ear, makes his whole body throb with want. The Dex that will storm out after an intense fight and leaves him breathless. Who kisses like he wants to sear the taste of anyone else from Derek’s mouth, leaves bruises like scattered rose petals on his skin. The Dex that cries angry tears, who gets angrier the more they fall, like water thrown on a gas fire.
Derek’s favorite version of Dex is the Dex with a bleeding heart. The Dex who will donate a dollar at every drive thru. The Dex with a chip on his shoulder. The Dex who quite literally gives people the shirt off his back. Who can’t pass by a homeless person without giving them something. The Dex that can barely afford to eat every month who gives and gives and gives until he can’t anymore. The Dex who picks up strays every weekend just by “coincidence.” The Dex who sometimes can’t sleep at night because he knows someone out there is hurting. The Dex that makes Derek desperate to be better.
Derek’s favorite version of Dex is the Dex that is steadfast, dependable. Competent, in every sense of the word. The Dex that fixes the dryer and the oven and the shower every other week. The Dex that actually has a toolbox with his initials on it. The Dex that has a budget and can stick to it. The Dex who already knows about taxes and social security. The Dex who works on his truck for fun. The Dex Derek knows he could probably marry, have the 2.5 kids and the white picket fence with. The Dex who makes forever feel possible.
Derek’s favorite version of Dex, is Dex. The Dex who cries at the end of Forrest Gump, who listens to Black Dog by Led Zeppelin on repeat. The Dex who has no table manners, who shovels food in his mouth like he’s angry at it. The Dex who is unendingly wheezy in the spring, and burns after ten minutes in the sun. The Dex who hates reading and doesn’t get art and really has no clue where “to thine own self be true” came from. Dex, who never really let Derek have a honeymoon phase. Dex, who Derek is wildly, hopelessly, boundlessly in love with.
Ok but what if for Halloween Dex wears a bad blond wig and glasses and Nursey wears a white snapback and salmon shorts
OK but the best thing about that is that Ransom and Holster CANNOT figure out who they are in costume as, and it just gets funnier as the night goes on because they keep guessing wrong.
Okay but then as they get more drunk they start hyperbolically acting out scenes from Ransom and Holsters life and they keep getting more and more touchy feely and ridiculous as the night goes on.
Dex: Bro…Share a beer with me bro…
Nursey: Bro…I’m going to fucking cherish that beer with you bro..
Dex: I just..I need you to know that this is such a special fucking moment for me man…
Nursey: Bro…
Holster: Bro…Are they like….a Meme…or something?
Ransom: I don’t know man…Hey share a beer with me bro?
Holster: Wait.
UM BUT WAIT
Lardo and Shitty go as Jack & Bitty. And this is Lardo and Shits we’re talking about so, it’s subversion galore. What does that mean? That mean Lardo is Jack and Shitty is Bits.
-Lardo goes all out with the contouring. I’m talking chiseled cheekbones, jawline. Blue contacts. Styles her hair like Jack, gets some Adidas track pants and a black t shirt.
-Shitty doesn’t shave his mustache, but he trims it so its not so bushy. He puts on a blonde wig and gets Lardo to style it. He gets a cute little button up, but that’s not the clincher. He puts on the TEENIEST little shorts, which just barely cover his ass and nads.
– Lardo wears a muscle suit and pads her butt with foam. She stands around frowning at everyone with her arms crossed. Jack sees her and says “I don’t do that.” AS HE’S STANDING THERE WITH HIS ARMS CROSSED, FROWNING.
-Shitty takes on a horrible southern accent and makes up incredibly bizarre exclamations (“mercy May heaven biscuits!”). He keeps draping himself suggestively over furniture, and Bitty keeps laughing so hard he cries.
-Lardo starts eating protein powder out of the tub with a spoon. Shitty starts peeling apples.
-its all fun and games until Shitty squats and his balls fall out of his shorts in front of everyone.
If someone would like to draw Dex in the Haus kitchen, wearing an apron and mixing ingredients, while Nursey looks on with heart eyes, that would be so amazing I’d scream.
The kicker is, Derek thinks, Dex is nothing like fire.
He’s capped in red, dotted with red like he’s been singed by a thousand bright sparks, but he’s not fire himself. He’s earth, grounded and serious and not given to flight or flame or fancy. Dex gets mad sometimes, but not everyone who gets mad is fire; in Dex’s case he’s an earthquake. A low shudder, a deep rumble, cracks appearing on the surface. If a building should crash to the ground, if an electrical wire should snap and start spraying sparks, those are all side effects. At the core of him, he’s tectonic plates. Low and slowly shifting, every deliberate movement deeply consequential. He’s the earth.
If anyone is fire, it’s Derek himself. He’s made of heat; his attention is constantly jumping; he’s brightness and carefully controlled excitement. He takes in anything, consumes it utterly, makes it part of himself. Burns his signature into it. But Derek has never been able to limit himself to just one element. He’s air, too, and water. He’s ice and metal. But as much as he loves the earth, loves to bury himself in leaves until he can feel the warmth of the soil beneath, he’s never been part of it. He’s never been an anchor.
Dex is. Dex is solid and sure, and, Derek is certain, he holds a core of warmth deep within. So Derek keeps burrowing down, trying to reach it. He wants to find that part of Dex that’s soft and yielding, that makes things grow. Somewhere beneath the surface, beneath hair and skin like a pile of flaming autumn leaves, is the gentle, giving touch of earth. Derek wants to roll around in it forever.
just moving along like everyone else 