A lesbian couple gets a shocking surprise one day when God (played by Laverne Cox) shows up at their door. Upset at how humans had turned her message of love and acceptance into a message of hate and discrimination, she decides it’s time to send Jesus back to earth and wants the lesbian couple to raise Jesus. Hilarity ensues.
No need for homophobic or transphobic jokes when you can have exchanges like
“Ma’am your son turned the water fountain into wine again and got all the other students drunk”
“Jesus Christ.”
“….. I’m not sure if that’s suppose to be you responding to me or you requesting to speak to him.”Also jokes about infinity-“Ask your mom”.
Kid: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s place?”
Mom #1: “Oh, I don’t know, sweetie. Ask your mom.”
Kid: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s?”
Mom #2: “I don’t know, have you asked your mom already?”
Kid praying: “Mom, can I sleep over at John’s place?”
God: “Have you asked your moms already?”
OH MY GOD YALL ARE KILLING IT
Title: Jesus, Mary & Josephine
Tag: notes on the media that needs to be made
but what if,,, what if humans aren’t the only Hold My Beer species.
We are one of two.
The Adt’harra people look kind of like a cross between a bat and an elf. Big ole radar dish ears, slender bipedal bodies, all that. Their planet is heavily forested with gargantuan mangrove swamps, and they lurk under the roots to hunt fish and birds. More importantly, they lurk under the roots to prank the shit out of any and all intergalactic visitors.
The Adt’harran love of pranks was at first a non-starter for joining the Intergalactic Alliance, but then they realized that these creatures were absolute geniuses for rigging complex mechanics in a matter of minutes, and also were simply too enthusiastic to refuse.
At around the same time, the Human people were discovered. They were rather flimsy compared to many other members of the Alliance, but further interaction proved them to be loyal crewmembers willing and able to risk life and limb for their cause and teammates. Further interaction also proved them to be reckless bastards who think it’s great fun to glue six warp cores together and try to poke a tunnel through a sun.
It was very quickly decided by the high-ups that Humans and Adt’harrans should never be allowed to interact, they would surely blow up at least three ships and cause a half dozen interplanetary incidents with their scheming.
When the Humans and Adt’harrans eventually meet anyway because neither species is really into ‘rules’, they are fast friends and the collective universe tears its hair out.
i know this post is a true vision of the future because i am a human and i can’t wait to meet the adt’harrans and go full mythbusters on the galaxy
to add to this “humans are weird” thing
did you know that humans are the only species on earth with the ability to throw things with any significant degree of accuracy and force (apes can throw with about the force of a human ten year old, but cant lock their wrists well enough for accuracy)and we just never really think about it bc its so easy and simple to us that pretty much all of our sports are based around the concept of throwing things accurately
so
what if the concept of projectile weapons takes most species FOREVER to get the hang of, or even come up with in the first place.
a human goes onto a ship and throws some trash into the nearest reclaimer, shouts “kobe!” and all the other aliens on board absolutely LOSE THEIR MINDS
“Everyone thinks he’s mentally ill but he actually just has superpowers.”
Okay, but like, what if both? Can we get a superhero with a mental illness depicted in a nominally positive way? That’s not just a cheap plot twist? Is that really too much to ask?
And not the whole “I’m psychotic and I could lose control of my powers at any moment” shit. I’m sick of that.
How about “I’m psychotic, but my telepathy helps a lot. If I think I’m hallucinating, my friends can let me see what they see and hear what they hear to keep me grounded in reality.”
Or you know, maybe someone whose mental illness and superpowers are unrelated. A speedster with depression who knows they /could/ clean their apartment in under four seconds, but would rather just watch Netflix and eat chocolate. A super strong hero who also has ocd and keeps rearranging their furniture, and sure it’s physically easy, but it’s still a pain.
Like, literally just in the few minutes it took me to write this post, I probably already came up with a good 30 character concepts. It’s not that hard, as long as you like, you know, think of mentally ill people as people and not plot devices.
“think of mentally ill people as people and not plot devices”
Yes please!Exactly this.
…I would actually really love to see the speedster with executive dysfunction problems, that sounds fantastic
i’ve got a vampire with severe depression. and a vampire who claims to be a sociopath but is mostly just dissociating hard and super traumatized due to being raised as a child solder and made to do murders before puberty.
they are taking a road trip.
i won’t say their mental illness isn’t part of the plot, but it’s not a plot device so much as their boss wants some anthills kicked and when you want that done you send jack, because jack has no impulse control and thinks getting stabbed is hilarious, and jacob has no fear because death sounds like a nice vacation.
just moving along like everyone else 