Aries: “I guess I’m ok with mine.” Taurus: “Wow this makes me feel super confident.” Gemini: “Half of me thinks this is stupid, the other half feels i may be an in-joke.” Cancer: “Fucking unrealistic I hate this. Unfollowed.” Leo: “Wow I DO like cats!” Virgo: “I don’t act like that, this isn’t worth a reblog.” Libra: “To be fair I did lick that swingset that one time.” Scorpio: “This is total shit, they’re talking about spiders. It’s Scorpio, idiots.” Sagittarius: “Wow this is like… So me… I feel it on a deep level. Horses, yeah.” Capricorn: “Haha lol what?” Aquarius: “Everyone knows astrology is fake you asshole.” Peixes: “They spelled Pisces wrong???”
bitty: it’s 100% easier not to do things than to do them
jack: in terms of, like, instant relief, canceling plans is like heroin
shitty: eat ass, suck a dick, and sell drugs
lardo: i have had a very long day. i am very small and i have no money. so you can imagine the kind of stress i am under
ransom: holster and i have a new house. it was built in the ’20s, but it was flipped in 2014. which means it’s haunted, but it has a lovely kitchen backsplash
holster: nothing that i know can help you with your car ever. unless you’re like, “hey, i’ve got a flat tire, does anyone here know a lot about 30 rock”?
chowder: it’s fun to be married. i’ve never been supervised before. i’m supervised. farmer studies what i do, like an anthropologist. she’ll be like, “sometimes, he will watch a movie on tv even though he already owns that movie on dvd. pointing this out to confuses and upsets him”
nursey: the bad guy would hold the joint in a villainous way. they’d always offer the joint in a way that no one ever holds a joint. like it’s a skull in a shakespeare play
dex: i’ll keep all my emotions right here, and then one day, i’ll die
tango: ah… numbers, the letters of math
whiskey: sometimes babies will point at me, and i don’t care for that shit at all
just moving along like everyone else 