Tag: memes

roachpatrol:

gutterowl:

astercrash:

gutterowl:

astercrash:

Almost all skulls speak only truth. Finding skulls that tell useful truths is harder. Visit truthskull.com today to find out if our skull verification services are right for your business.

Fuck this shill bullshit. I asked these TruthShill losers for one–just one!–skull that can tell me which late-night Arby’s parking lots are best for getting railed by werewolves in. They had security escort me out of the building.

0/10 TRUTHSUCK, THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAUS RIGHT!!!

Ma’am we are… We’re trying to run a business here. We could not take your many proposed alternate names for our website. Do you know how long we agonised over truthskull.com? It was hard. There were late nights. Coffee was drank. You can’t just burst in with suggestions like theywontletyoufucktheskulls.com at 2am. We just… We can’t take that kind of….. You made poor jimmy cry. Poor jimmy who tries so hard. Please ma’am. Please take your business and your saucy skulls elsewhere. One of them only spoke rude words.

1) Fuck you

2) it’s false advertising if you don’t tell me upfront that I can’t fuck the skulls, and also entrapment. I’m an american and I my rights are protected by the constitution

3) what kind of skull brothel are you even running. that’s like opening a Wendys™ where the drive-thru guy won’t even sell you weed

3) also fuck. You

4) and fuck jimmy in particular, that was only a HALF nelson and i even let him go without a ten count

they let you fuck the skulls if you ask nice enough

buddy they won’t even let ME fuck the skull

aven-rave:

anti-sjw-movement:

klubbhead:

klubbhead:

GIRL WYD????? DUMP HIM.

I did some digging and found out why this dude went douchebag

She’s one of THOSE shoppers 😛

NO BUT SERIOUSLY THO!!! Check this out!

I found out their entire photoshoot (I think). They were a happy couple once:

D’awww

IT GETS BETTER THO

They TOTALLY had a 3some with that chick in red dress at some point. 

Most (if not all) of their stock photos here

So much story here

Someone just made a romance story out of fucking stock photos.

The signs as DnD subclasses

momnar:

momnar:

Aries: Wizard, Necromancy 

Taurus: Ranger, Beast master 

Gemini: Sorcerer, Wild Surge 

Cancer: Cleric, War Domain 

Leo: Druid, Circle of the Moon 

Virgo: Paladin, Oath of Devotion 

Libra: Bard, College of Lore 

Scorpio: Rogue, Arcane Trickster 

Sagittarius: Monk, Way of the Open Fist 

Capricorn: Barbarian, Path of the Berserker 

Aquarius: Fighter, Eldritch Knight 

Pisces: Warlock, Old Ones

crimsonclad:

The thing about Persuasion that just kills me is that the central premise— “I hope the person who broke my heart has a miserable life and I get to watch them be humiliated while I get everything I ever wanted” is so universal.

But Wentworth is only able to fully enjoy it for like A DAY before he starts realizing how terrible it is. He watches Anne suffer in silence and he hates it. He watches her being treated like an inconvenience and a joke and a piece of furniture and he hates it. He hears sneering comments at her expense and he hates it. He spends evening after evening in her company, where he is celebrated as a handsome, dashing hero while she is shoved to the side and ignored and he hates it.

He probably spent a lot of heartbroken hours out on the sea wishing revenge on her (like ten years’ worth), but then he gets to see it happening and revenge turns out not to be that sweet after all. He probably thought “I hope she never gets married to anyone else and she has to spend the rest of her miserable life with her miserable family, listening to them talk about nothing and regretting ever letting me go.” But then he has to watch her live through it, and it is just excruciating. Watching her bite her tongue. Watching her keep her eyes down on her clasped hands. Watching her silently accept everything as if she deserves it.

He’s like, “YES, it’s all HAPPENING! She’s all ALONE and PALE and OLD and…sad. And her family treats her terribly, and she’s— no one is talking to her. No one even knows that she’s funny and smart, they just— they just make her sit in the corner. She’s hardly eating anything. And she really isn’t that old, but they are acting like she’s dead? Her family is even worse than they used to be, how is that even possible? Why isn’t anyone helping her? Why is she the only person taking care of anyone? Why isn’t anyone taking care of her?”

And his nasty “she’s so altered I should not have known her again” comment that he KNOWS got back to her starts ringing in his ears. And his cocky “yeah I’m just here to find a YOUNG, HOT girl to marry now that I’m SUCH A CATCH, whatevs” approach starts to make him feel queasy, because she’s HELPING, she’s trying to stay out of his way and help him pick a young wife, and she hardly ever smiles anymore, not really. He watches her slip out of rooms when he enters them and he hears her laughing with her nephew sometimes but then go quiet when anyone else approaches, and he doesn’t know what to do.

Anyway, every fandom has a bunch of Pride and Prejudice AUs, but I WANT PERSUASION AUS. I NEED THEM. I NEED THEM.