He’s a professional wrestler now. I think he is signed with WWE’s developmental nXt brand last i saw. On the indies his “finisher” was the Nico Nico Knee
Gimli: the fuck should I make for Legolas as a courting gift
Thorin, probably:
PERFECT!
When you try to break the siege and save Dale, but the Orc Army is led by Dagalur…
DETS GODDAMNIT I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU JUST MADE ME LAUGH ABOUT THAT
Readers: please no more angst we can’t take it
Dets:
ACCURATE AF BWAAAHAHAHAHA
okay okay i’m gonna stop… after these announcements…
I think if I reblog this post anymore I might break my dash. BUT I CAN’T NOT REBLOG THESE ADDITIONS. DETS THAT LAST ONE HAD ME ROLLING ON THE FLOOR GODDAMN YOU THAT SONG IS SUPPOSED TO MAKE ME DEPRESSED NOT THINK OF THE DOS EQUIS GUY
luke skywalker made SURE that his astral projection wore the sleekest black number (thread count: 900), even brushed off dirt that didn’t hit him just for the drama of it all. there’s only one bad bitch and there he is in custom gucci boots!
And did you notice that he trimmed up his beard too? AND touched up his roots. Iconic.
Somewhere within the Force, Padme Amidala is beaming with pride.
Luke Skywalker astral projected himself dressed in Space Gucci™ head to toe and in peak Dramatique form, purposefully waited until the last moment to reveal to Kyle Ron that his bitch ass had been punkd before immediately peacing out and ascending into the force BUT NOT BEFORE HE GOT ONE LAST DRAMATIC MOODY STARE INTO A BINARY SUNSET (does this planet even have two sun’s?????) like this is it we have reached peak Skywalker Drama anakin is sobbing with pride out in the force honestly when could your fave ever
I LEARNED RECENTLY THAT PLATO WON THE GOLD MEDAL IN THE OLYMPICS FOR WRESTLING THREE TIMES. THIS PUTS A NEW PERSPECTIVE ON THINGS. I ALWAYS IMAGINED PLATO TO BE FRAIL AND MISSHAPEN BUT HE MUST HAVE BEEN FRICKEN RIPPED. I WONDER IF ARISTOTLE EVER FELT ANXIETY ABOUT GETTING PHYSICALLY (I.E. NOT JUST METAPHYSICALLY) DISMANTLED BY PLATO. PLATO WAS PROBABLY PISSED OFF BY AT LEAST A HANDFUL OF QUESTIONS ARISTOTLE ASKED HIM. ARISTOTLE WAS A LITERAL GENIUS TOO. IMAGINE PLATO LECTURING AND WRITING ON A BLACKBOARD AND ARISTOTLE THROWING A COMMENT OUT THERE ABOUT SOME COMPLEX MISSTEP IN PLATO’S LOGIC AND PLATO’S CHALK JUST SNAPS AND ARISTOTLE’S TESTICLES SUCK WAY BACK UP TO WHERE THEY DROPPED FROM, THEN PLATO IN A BLUR APPEARS BESIDE ARISTOTLE SITTING AT HIS DESK AND HE PICKS HIM UP AND SUPLEXES HIS MACEDONIAN ASS.
given the content of a lot of Plato’s conclusions I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that Plato responded to a lot of reasonable criticisms with “Fight me” and that was the end of it.
We’re not actually sure whether Plato is his real name! Some people speculate that, because Platon means “broad” in Greek, this was actually his wrestling nick name. Basically, it’s like Dwayne Johnson became a famous philosopher and everyone still called him “The Rock”.
More and more I wish we kind of had time traveling capabilities.
Now I can’t stop thinking about Plato looking like The Rock
Now I can’t stop thinking about a film where The Rock plays Plato.
what if it was a bruce banner situation and he’s really logical and calm usually but when some dumbass won’t stopp dragging down the discourse with grade one logic errors he just
just moving along like everyone else 