thanksillpass:

Kasamatsu thinks this is what dying feels like – you can’t breathe and can feel your brain collapsing on itself, the desperate rush of blood the only sound you can hear. His face feels hot, his palms are wet, and Kise is looking at him patiently and respectfully like Yukio doesn’t look like he’s choking on his own tongue at all.

He tries to calm down by reminding myself that this is it – the graduation, the last stop; they won’t see each other ever again, probably, not if Kasamatsu can help it, he’s going far away enough anyway. Kise rocks on the balls of his feet awkwardly, still aggravatingly patient, and Kasamatsu grits his teeth.

He fists his palm and presses it against Kise’s chest, a little bit more violently than he intended, making Kise stagger back slightly and frown in confusion. Yukio uncurls his fingers slowly and presses his hand flat against Kise’s heart, still unable not looking at him.

He lets go then and turns around to leave, hears a gasp escape Kise’s lips but he keeps going, he won’t turn back, he can’t face him. That’s the one challenge Kasamatsu Yukio has to back down from and he deserves the privilege of running away, he’s worked hard enough to earn it. He’s not a coward.

“You’re a coward, senpai!” Kise shouts, and Yukio falters in his steps.

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