My favorite two photos probably in the world. Why does my cat look like she’s about to go off on the roast to end all roasts? Why is my boyfriend holding a glass that says “ghouls just want to have fun”? Modern art
Why do you have cardboard cutouts of obama and Bernie in your living room and why did I think they were random people and that this was a picture of a party
Found a book that summarizes literature and literary figures in text form, and the Byron one might be the best thing to ever happen.
I’ve seen posts joking about how hard it must be to guess what internet culture is next going to find funny. As if to prove the point, here we see tumblr taking a break from Cask of Amontillado references to return to its intermittent habit of dragging Lord Byron.
We start with a slow pan down to Gotham as Oracle narrates
“Ask your average person who Gotham’s most famous citizen is, and you’ll get the same response every time: Bruce Wayne. Everybody’s heard of Bruce Wayne. You’ve probably heard his name a million times before. But there are some things that the average citizen doesn’t know about him. See, to the people of Gotham, Bruce Wayne is a rich kid who never grew up. They think he’s a buffoon, an airhead, a moron. But the truth is…”
*Batman bursts out of a window, screaming, on fire*
*record scratch, freeze frame*
“…they aren’t entirely wrong about that.”
EHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE
This is then followed by a series of clips from interviews with various Gotham citizens, all of whom give humorously ironic descriptions of Bruce Wayne’s idiocy:
“Bruce Wayne? I hear the guy gets through a super-car every month! Replaces every one, just like that!”
*Cut to shot of the Batmobile flipping end-over-end after slamming into one of Bane’s APCs*
“Wayne? Please! The guy would probably have accidentally killed himself years ago if he didn’t have that butler to babysit him!”
*Cut to Alfred physically restraining Bruce from going out to fight Scarecrow while having a broken arm, a concussion, and the flu,*
“I bet he throws away cash like it grows on trees!”
*Cut to Batman shouting “Hey, Lucius! Ask R&D to make some kryptonite/Nth metal alloy baterangs! Y’know, just in case!”
“I’m almost jealous. Super rich and he gets to hang out with gorgeous women across the world? Sign me up!”
*Cut to Bruce being slammed face first into a wall repeatedly by Lady Shiva.*
Actually, I think this may be the best part of the evilicious finale.
Alton: “Alright, so here is your blade! You gotta cut down the coconut! ”
Chef Yaku: “I’m happy to let him pay $26,000 for a coconut tree. Because I’m tall, I just reach straight up and start grabbing coconuts off the tree. And I don’t really have time to look for a tool and open them…”[smashes coconuts] “Man, you think a stupid coconut gon’ stop me!”
Other chef: “This dude’s like smashing through these coconuts! What am I up against here?!” [to Chef Yaku] “Ah, man…”
just moving along like everyone else 