Tag: fair folk

theworldsactuallynotthatsmall:

elvensemi:

locust-god:

glumshoe:

The Fair Folk: “I can’t believe this. Twenty years I’ve cleaned your house and you DARE to try to REPAY me with GIFTS. This is such an insult. Fuck you, you insolent humans. I’m leaving here and never returning because you have insulted me so deeply.”

Also the Fair Folk: “Remember that one time you pulled a thorn out of a cat’s foot? That was me. To show my gratitude, here is a house made of solid gold, a life-debt, my daughter’s hand in marriage, and a promise that all your children will be gorgeous and successful at all that they do. I can also throw in a blow job if you want. I hope this is enough. I don’t want to seem ungrateful.”

ship are you making a callout post for faeries

#now to be fair #i have always interpreted this dichotomy as#you can leave them gifts #but not as repayment#because otherwise you’re just paying them to clean your house#and so the insult is to imply that they are servants performing labor for compensation#when in reality they are Magnanimous Bros#totally just cleaning your nasty house out of the goodness of their good good hearts#and if you want to also be a bro #and give them some uncurdled milk and honey#that’s cool because that’s what bros do#but if you’re like ‘here’s some food for cleaning my house’ it’s like #EXCUSE ME#ARE YOU IMPLYING THAT YOU’RE ONLY GIVING ME THIS BECAUSE I DID SOMETHING FOR YOU#WHAT KIND OF FRIEND ARE YOU#FUCK OFF WITH THAT THEN I THOUGHT WE WERE BROS

This is the quality content I look for on my dash

theotherjax:

It occurs to me that one possible reason why I find fairies of the Fair Folk Beautiful and Terrible Kings and Queens Blah Blah boring and vaguely distasteful is that when you strip down all the glamour, they’re basically bored rich kids randomly fucking with average people for their amusement just because they can. Like I get that Spring Storms Made Flesh and Lords of the Secret World but if Kellyaghnn from PE invited you to a Victorian-themed party complete with 1000$-a-piece tiny hats at her sixteen-room mansion with all her immaculately spray-tanned friends who giggle about What Fools These Working Classes Be, and then when you ate a single raisin promptly told you that now you have to stay in her house and work as her servant for free for the rest of your life to pay it off, possibly while dressed as a farm animal, you wouldn’t respond by sighing dreamily about how she’s Beyond Good and Evil.