when i was younger i watched the spongebob squarepants movie and obviously like any sane person i loved the “Goofy Goober Rock” song, but i had no fucking idea that it was just a parody of a real song, and about 4 months ago the radio was on and “I Wanna Rock” came on and i almost shit my pants in REAL life.
This southern sea otter is pawsitively excited to sea you!
These otterly adorable creatures can be found in Monterey Bay National Marine Sanctuary, where they serve as an important keystone species in kelp forests. Sea otters eat invertebrates like sea urchins, which like to chow down on kelp. By eating urchins, sea otters help keep those populations down so the forest can grow and thrive.
When you’re visiting the coast, give these significant otters plenty of space – a zoom lens can be key!
(Photo: Douglas Croft)
Please enjoy this unbearably adorable picture of a sea otter in the Monterey Bay National Marine Sanctuary. Cute and major contributors to marine ecosystems!
what i mean by that is that many repressed or questioning lesbians don’t think they can be a lesbian for whatever reason, but they want to be. they’re drawn to the word lesbian, lesbian culture, and lesbians in general. they dread the idea that they’ll have to settle down with a man eventually. they wish they could be a lesbian so that they’ll have a reason to not be with men, but they think they’re not cool or brave enough, or that maybe they could possibly, theoretically love a guy at some point so calling themselves a lesbian would be wrong. so to all those questioning wlw out there, i’m telling you right now: if you want to be a lesbian, you’re probably a lesbian. you’re allowed to be a lesbian.
okay, so, admittedly i misread this, but it was already turning out in a super fun way so i just decided to run with it. have a little something from post-canon!
On the third ring, Joaquin has to step out of his math class, because whoever’s calling him is calling instead of texting and that means it’s serious.
All eyes are on him as he whispers an apology to his teacher and steps out into the hallway. He’s sure it’s not just because of the call; having magic powers tends to make him a target for people’s stares, nowadays. Unfortunately it doesn’t seem to have gotten him much else. An exemption from math class, for example.
The door swings mercifully shut behind him, and Joaquin presses the phone to his ear. “Uh, hi, whoever this is?” he whispers, because one of the hall monitors is a few doors down and eyeing him suspiciously. “This isn’t a good time.”
“Hey, kid! Am I on the right frequency?”
Joaquin freezes and cranks up the volume. “Uh, sorry… is this—”
“Taako,” the voice on the other end drawls. “Y’know, from TV? And also the end of the world, keep fuckin’ forgetting about that one. Uh… listen. I’ve got a bit of a—uh, we have a bit of a situation here, and—”
“Whoa, just—hold on a sec.” The hall monitor is definitely staring now. “Where is here? Where are you? How did you even get my number?”
“World savior privileges. So the thing is—”
Joaquin blinks. “Oh my God, are you… are you here in this world? Like, actually here?”
He can practically hear Taako’s shrug through the phone. “Near as I can tell.”
man this has been said before by cleverer folks than me, but sometimes you have to sit down and let the sheer size and age of the storytelling tradition just completely overwhelm you, ja feel?
like– think for a second about how mind-bogglingly incredible it is that we know who osiris is? that somebody just made him up one day, and told stories about him to their kids, and literally thousands and thousands of years later we are still able to go “there was a god whose brother cut him into pieces”, it’s so arbitrary, it’s so incredible
that in talking about scheherazade and her husband, you are doing something that someone in every single generation has done since it was written– you are telling stories that have lasted an impossible amount of time
can you conceive of telling a story, and then traveling into the future and hearing that same story told– with alterations, and through media that you could not possibly conceive of, but your story– in the year 3214?
the fact that we! as a species! have been telling the same damn stories for so long– the fact that we’ve seen homer’s troy and chaucer’s troy and shakespeare’s troy and troy with fucking brad pitt because we never fucking stop telling stories! never ever ever!
we never stop caring about stories, or returning to the same stories, or putting our own spins on stories. we never stop talking about the characters as if they were real, or asking what happened next, or asking to hear it again.
generation after generation, they never ever ever stop mattering to us.
The Osiris one is interesting because it was dead or very heavily mutated until we started translating hieroglyphs and it was reborn. Like those seed vaults in Norway written language has a way of preserving stories which then reemerge and spread virulently across the population again.
being a storyteller is both a sacred trust, and the wildest, freest rebellion. it’s as ancient as language, as ancient as thought, but it’s also as fresh as drunken improv comedy and the latest meme. everyone tells stories instinctively and easily, but to be a master takes decades of practice. we learn about the human condition and the real world through stories, but they also let us speculate about impossible places and alien people.
it is possibly the only abstraction more universal than religion. i’m not sure humanity could survive without it.
alRIGHT you coulda just clapped his hand you didn’t have to call forth a storm from the heavens
Elf Smith like “Gandalf with the fucking dramatics again”
if this land had jocks, this guy would be the captain
IT’S THE MEME. YA’LL HE SAID THE THING. HE SAID THE MEME. IT’S THAT GUY.
a family can be 2 humans, a dwarf, a wizard, 4 hobbits and orlando bloom
ALL THIS TIME. FOR AS LONG AS I HAVE BEEN ON THE INTERNET I THOUGHT IT WAS A JOKE. JUST A BUNCH OF FUCKERS DOING SOME WONDERS WITH PHOTOSHOP. BUT NO. NO.
THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENS. IT HAPPENS AND IT IS TERRIFYING. I YELLED.
just moving along like everyone else 