i think that instead of pulling the metaphorical knife out of my chest and letting it heal, enduring the pain which would eventually lead to it healing, i just left a big ass metaphorical weapon in my chest and let it heal over, all fucked up and such so the metaphorical wound bever actually healed and never silved the problem, which was that i have a huge weapon impaled in my chest

sometimes – most of the time – i feel fine. and other times it hurts real bad and i know theres something wrong