michelletheeditor:

Humans are weird idea: malicious compliance. The aliens either do as they’re told or place an objection if there’s a specific reason, and once ordered to perform a task they do it to the best of their ability because their authority is logical and fair. Then humans show up and start disobeying in a way that is technically correct and they have no idea what to do.

“Human, you were instructed to bring ration packs to the storage bay.”

“I did.”

“There are only two ration packs here.”

“You didn’t say how many you wanted.”

“Why would I request only two? The ship needs to be restocked with supplies for a five-cycle mission.”

“Hey, I’m not a mind reader. You’re going to have to be more specific.”

*sigh* “Human, please bring the entire pallet of ration packs into the storage bay.”

…

“Human, why is the station’s luggage transport vehicle still in the storage bay?”

“You wanted it taken back out?“

“The vehicle belongs to the station. It doesn’t even fit in the storage bay.”

“Hey, after Tau Alpha you told me not to do anything unless I was ordered to. Nobody told me the forklift needed to be put away again.”

*alien turns rather purplish and makes a low hissing noise*

“…If you want me to put the forklift back you’re gonna need to give me an order, sir.”

*more hissing*