birb-sneks:

nuka-rockit:

Depression™! 

comes with multiple fun features such as:

• exhaustion! but not enough to sleep just lie on the floor like a wet towel
• whoops! shouldve eaten 2 hours ago
• all food tastes equally boring! yeah that piece of old bread and 4 pickles will do
• staring at the ceiling!
• lose your train of thought every 5 minutes! whatever youre trying to do sure won’t get done anytime soon
• every activtiy feels pointless! even your favourite hobbies. Especially your favourite hobbies!
• loneliness! but also you feel like a burden to everyone you know so good luck with that
• staring at the wall!
• wearing the same sweatpants for 3 days straight! because who can be bothered? not you that’s for sure!
• yelling at people for no reason! because now even their breathing annoys you 
• staring at the wall some more!
• Suddenly crying over tiny things! such as dropping your favourite pencil. it’s not even broken. but who gives a fuck!

ORDER TODAY! 

Or don’t. You’ll receive it either way!

because there is no escape!

Order now and receive our grab-bag of bonuses! With fan favorites like:

A chance at random bouts of mania where you start ten million new projects but get quickly overwhelmed and none of them get done which drives you into a deeper depression!

A complete disregard for any and all personal hygiene! When was the last time you used your toothbrush? Doesn’t matter, ‘cause you won’t touch it tonight!

Just got your paycheck? Not anymore! Spend as much as you can in a futile attempt to make yourself feel better! You really don’t need that novelty throw pillow, but what if you do?

And there’s more where that came from! Order today!!!