some AUs i’ll never write but definitely want to read

prussium:

• ‘we used to be in a band but you left bc you despise the music industry now we’re world-famous i wrote a song abt missing you i hope you get lonely when you hear it on the radio bc THAT’S HOW YOU MAKE ME FEEL YOU ASSHOLE’ AU
• ‘we’re new roommates and someone told you i’m at the hospital you panic and then you remember i work at a hospital’ AU
• ‘you are a selfish, parasitic, amoral person who has done unforgivable things why did you give up your life to save mine’ AU
• ‘you live across the hall and you’re in your underwear every time you open the door it’s so frustrating stOP SMILING OH GOD I CAN’T EVEN LOOK AT YOU IN THE EYES’ AU
• ‘we were childhood best friends who meet again and have to work together we used to be v close and i actually lov– hey why don’t you remember me at all did you get amnesia or something’ AU
• ‘you’re an atheist and im a conservative gay catholic you’ve never been a jerk abt my faith and u even wait for me outside the church every sunday i really appreciate it’ AU
• ‘we’re both travelers and i hate how you speak the native language so well where are you staying btw do u want to make out’ AU
• ‘it’s raining hard and i only have my designer coat then you, a savage person in a truck, came along and now i’m soaking wet do you know how much this coat costs’ AU
• ‘who am i??? what happened?? ??? well mate, i’m just a loyal bar patron and a total stranger whom you kissed and asked if i wanted to see your butt last night’ AU
• ‘i had a terrible day and i’m on the bus stuck in heavy traffic you’re waiting for your ride outside and we have a staring contest then u blink and smile like the big dork that u are i cant believe i smiled back’ AU